How To Find Your Unique Life Path (if you're feeling lost)

Don't follow your passion, do this instead...

Follow your passion and you will never work a day in your life.

WRONG.

When I first heard this quote, I was like a starving child who got offered ice cream.

The idea of doing what I loved for a living was a dream.

Does this mean I could play video games, watch anime, study the universe, and never worry about money again? 

That’s what my 16-year-old self thought.

Bless that poor kid’s heart.

In reality, most of us are forced to choose a career path after high school. We're pressured to go to college and choose a major before we’ve even considered three important things:

  1. Our strengths

  2. Our weaknesses

  3. (Most importantly) what we can tolerate for 8-12 hours a day, 5 days a week without wanting to strangle someone.

Most people miserably choose a path to settle for the next 40 years.

I certainly didn’t choose the right career my first time around. Hell, I couldn’t decide which major to choose (I changed it 5 times).

I focused on the wrong question: “What job makes a lot of money?”

When I should’ve asked: “What type of work would energize me enough for money to become an afterthought?”

The biggest mistake most people make

Here’s the sad truth:

We settle for a stable job and justify how the company has all the benefits.

  • 401Ks with match

  • Medical insurance

  • 2 weeks of PTO

When there’s a bigger problem to think about: Our sense of purpose in the day-to-day hustle.

More on this later.

If you're not satisfied with your career like I was, there's still hope for you.

I can only speak from experience.

5 years ago, I was down on my luck after quitting my fitness career. I had burnt out from a sales job at LA Fitness after 9 months.

Did I regret it?

No.

I learned a ton of skills but it wasn't aligned with who I am at my core.

The daily grind of harassing people to buy an overpriced and underserved training contract didn't light up my soul. It drained it.

But I was passionate about fitness. I loved to work out and teach people what I learned to improve their bodies and performance.

I made a big mistake though.

Not considering what the day-to-day looked like in my career.

The Hustle Life didn’t allow me to spend enough time with my family or make the impact I was looking for. 

Plus I thought I wanted to be a famous Fitness YouTuber like Elliott Hulse and Omar Isuf — a story for another day.

Today, I work a job as a Machine Learning Engineer.

I've been there for 3 years, longer than any job I've ever had.

Do I love it?

Mostly.

It pays well for my family of 4. I have the opportunity to learn new technologies. I have a lot of flexibility for when and how I work. And I get to work from home.

It checks a lot of the boxes of how my values align.

If you're curious about how I did it, you can read it here, but here's the short version:

I spent a few months reflecting on a few key questions (down below).

Rediscover your hidden power

Realistically, your job might not be 100% aligned but it should meet your needs in most areas.

You can always supplement it with a creative side hustle.

Today I'm going to show you how I discovered my path using a few simple questions and an exercise you can work on to find yours. 

With these tools, you can create your own path and decide how to make a career out of it.

I found a job that can meet my needs without having to spend so much time working.

On the side, I can do what I enjoy most while not having to worry about

  • financial stress

  • imposing deadlines

  • commuting for hours

Here are two of the best methods to find your purpose, business niche, or creative calling:

Ikigai

A Japanese concept that means a reason for being.

Ask yourself and write down the answers to these four questions:

  • What do you love doing? (Passion)

  • What can you be paid for? (Profit)

  • What are you good at? (Profession)

  • What does the world need? (Purpose)

Take your time.

Answer from the heart not what you think you should answer.

Remember: they need to align with your values, not what someone else said you should do.

Meditate on your answers then merge them to find your unique path.

For me, my job as an ML Engineer meets 2 out of the 4, profit and profession.

I use this newsletter and create self-improvement content to fill in the gaps for purpose and passion.

We can aim to merge the 4 into a single path with time, exploration, and mastery.

Life Path Reversal

Many of us think about what big goals we want to achieve and obsess over them. The problem is that when we don't see results right away, we get discouraged and quit.

Let me challenge this norm. You should focus on something else:

What you want your day-to-day to look like.

Be specific.

  • What time do you want to wake up in the morning?

  • What kind of place do you want to live?

  • Who do you want to live with or around?

  • Do you have kids or pets?

  • How do you feel 90% of the time? Emotions?

  • What kind of routines are you doing?

  • What does your body look like?

  • What kind of clothes do you wear?

  • How do you speak to yourself? Others?

  • Where do you spend most of your time?

Don't limit yourself.

What is your dream life? Let your imagination run wild so you can act on this next point.

(note: assume money is taken care of)

Working backward from that lifestyle. 

Once you've broken that down enough, your next step should be clear.

Don't worry if you don't know yet. Spend some time figuring this out.

I know it's difficult because maybe you've never stretched your imagination this far.

But trust me, it's worth it.

You will gain clarity on how to act with enough reflection and action. And that confidence is what you need to stop feeling lost and confused.

So just chill, till the next episode…

For the past 6 months or more, I’ve explored to find what the hell my calling is. I discovered that it’s been right in front of me all along.

But I needed the confidence to realize that I just need to work on it knowing it may change or teach me something powerful.

I couldn’t do it alone and I don’t want you to either.

Here are some of the resources I’ve used to rediscover my life path.

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